As if we women were not competitive enough already, the internet world goes ahead and throws something else in there for us to excite our competitive selves over. So what centers around this new competitive streak? Handbags, extreme cupcake baking, or eyelash curling – perhaps? No, we are talking about online dating profiles; specifically, online dating profiles to attract men. You would be surprised as to how many women turn to online dating. If you assumed that men were the only ones having trouble picking up decent women at a bar, then you assumed wrong. Apparently women have just as much trouble finding the right guy to get their attention, or making eye contact with the right type of Romeo.
Take myself, for example. Even I, already in a happily committed relationship, was approached with the subject of online dating. At a gathering one evening, a girlfriend suggested I make an online dating profile.
“But I’m already in a relationship!”
“It doesn’t even matter! It is fun! Just see what you can get.”
“Oh my goodness, I’ve actually gone on so many dates with guys that turned out to be okay. I met my current boyfriend on Match.com.
“That’s really nice.”
“Right? Get in on it! You have to have a good picture though. Like, make sure that you are showing your best assets.”
Needless to say, I did not get on it. But it opened my mind to the whole scene of online dating – which I had supposed was mainly congested with males. The thing with online dating, just like with any other pick-and-choose activity, is that there are a lot of fish in the sea. And being the amazing little fishy that you are, you need to get yourself to stand out. Luckily, we are going to show you how!
Creating An Online Profile
Before we get into creating the best online profile for you to attract men, the first thing you are going to have to do is to set up an actual profile. We are going to go over the basics that you need to know to put yourself out on the cyber-market!
Be Specific: Knowing specifically what you want out of a partner will help you hone into certain characteristics so that you can attract the type of men that you want! Cover the basics, which include: whether or not you are looking for short term, long term, or marriage, the approximate age of someone you are looking for, and sexual orientation.
Their Qualities: A lot of people tend to list out the qualities that they are looking for in a partner, such as: must haves, good to have, and no-nos. This could seem a little pushy, but at least you will know what you are getting. Especially if you are someone who wants to share certain interests with your partner, then be sure to include those on your “must haves” list!
You Qualities: Here is your chance to let yourself shine! Think about things that you feel make you unique. Not everything has to be as amazing as, “went skydiving in Hawaii!” or “rescued 10 homeless puppies.” Even simple things that may seem insignificant to you might be some very attractive qualities that a man is looking for!
A Name: Just as when you sign up for any other online site, you are going to have to come up with a catchy screen name. Try not to be inappropriate. Keep it simple, classy, and to the point, but unique at the same time. Think about things you like to do, what you are looking for, and what excites you about life. Some women might think to use words like “sexy” or “voluptuous”, but that could just attract the wrong kind of attention.
Photograph: Unfortunately, a lot of men are drawn to visually-pleasing images of women. We can’t blame them, because sometimes we are the same way. The main thing about posting a picture on your profile is that you are going to want to do it. Profiles with no pictures tend to go unnoticed and get much fewer responses. However, keep in mind that you are not going to want to show anything too obnoxious or pretentious in your photographs. Remember ladies – keep it classy! We know that can be tough to do with all those self poses to choose from!
Headlines: Headlines are an extremely important part of your profile, because your headline, along with your picture, will help a man decide whether or not they want to click into your profile or head down another path. Just like a great opening line in a movie or novel, you are going to want to hook your readers and get them to wanting more. Be mysterious and leave some things to their imagination!
Positiveness: Men love positive women who come across as self-assured and confident. No one likes a Debbie downer or someone who thinks that “all men are losers”. As such, avoid any phrases or lines that come across as negative or have the word “loser” in them. No one wants to hear your sob story online – they want to know you!
Polished: If you are just starting out in the dating scene online, you will probably continue updating and polishing your profile as things pan out. Feel free to edit it as much as you like, surf the web for other examples of helpful tips, and make sure that you feel as comfortable and confident about your online profile as you would with an outfit you put on for a date!
Now, let’s take a look at some things that men like to see in online dating profiles.
- Their profile and picture go together: If a girl’s profile details a lot about being in nature, loving the outdoors, or having a passion for animals – then guys like it when their profile picture is in accordance to their words. Therefore, when they meet, they are more likely to be assured that they are going to know what they are going to get.
- Conversational: Guys do not want to feel like they are reading a Sunday newspaper advertisements or listening to a paid television spot. The best way to make your profile seem like you is to be conversational and real.
- Common Interests: Your interests should be included in your profile, or under your “must haves”. Guys are going to naturally gravitate towards things that they like to do themselves. However, this does not mean that you should list “sports watching, video game playing, or rock climbing” as some of your interests. Guys like individuality and personality as well!
- Confidence: Guys like confident women. Too many times you are met with women who are obviously self-conscious about herself. The truth is, most of us are, but that does not mean we should portray ourselves to the world in that way. Let your profile show that you are comfortable in your skin and proud of who you are.
- Values: The more mature the guy, the more they are going to look for similar values in their partner. For instance, if you say you enjoy “giving and helping others”, you will likely attract men who share that same passion and put value in themselves for their ability to give.
Online Dating Profile No-no’s
On the flip side, there are some obvious things that you should avoid when you are creating your online profile, and we are going to point out a few of them to you. These will likely send men clicking, or running, the other way!
- Lists upon lists: No one likes to feel like they are reading a shopping list, and trying to figure out where they fit on that list, and men are no different. If they see a list of qualities that a woman might be looking for, they are going to tire or be easily overwhelmed. Keep things simple, and focus on what you have to offer your potential mate rather than all the qualities that you might be looking for in them.
- Needy: If there are any keywords that will make your profile seem needy, the best thing to do is avoid them. Men generally hate nothing more than a woman who needs him to be their “everything”. If your expectations look to high, then he is going to probably click “next”.
- Boring: We know you mean well, but if your profile is limited to “long walks on the beach or reading on Sundays”, then you can expect not to get too many responses to choose from. Even if you enjoy reading, try to spice up the way you present yourself in your profile by providing specific instances and examples for a good kick.
- Depressive: If your profile comes off as depressive, no one is going to want to read it, or at the very least, take their time to get to know you. For instance, if you insert sob stories about failed past relationships or dating experiences, do not expect a man to be at all amused.
Log In (Wisely!)
Well, ladies, now that we have that taken care of, it is time to put yourself out on the online dating market. Be positive, and remember that many a successful relationship has been created via internet. Be yourself, and have fun!