Unless you are one of those gregarious, outgoing types of personalities, you probably want to know how to meet people in a new city. Or maybe you haven’t landed in a new city, but have a new job or finally got that person out of your life that was really bad for you. Making new friends can seem like work if you are afraid of making the wrong friends or you work so much it is just plain hard to find them! There are some surefire ways to meet fun people that are just like you, though.
New Places and New Friends
If you hang out doing things that you love then you have a very high probability of finding people who love the same activities that you do. So, if you love to ski then hit the slopes a lot this winter. If you love surfing and hanging out at the beach, just go there more often! You will start talking to people and get to know them, even if you are a bit shy. The more often you see the same people there, the more familiar they will become. They will maybe say hi or ask you where you are from once you no longer look like someone who is just passing through. If you look like a regular to their favorite spot then they are going to be naturally curious as to who you are and what you are about. After talking a bit, you might really hit it off and make plans to meet up at another place doing what you both love.
Bad Friends vs Good Friends
Not everyone is someone that will bring out the best in you. There are some friend match-ups that go just plain wrong from the beginning. Nobody wants a new friend that will be a constant drain on you financially or emotionally so it is important to be able to size people up before getting too close to them. You want to make sure they share the same values as you, enjoy the same activities and are not looking for just another sucker to hit up for rides everywhere, money and who knows what else.
So, you need to learn how to quickly thin the herd. There are some secrets to reading body language that you will find very helpful in sorting through potential friends. People do wear their emotions as body language and facial expressions so you can see what they might be thinking just by reading a person’s face and that is also helpful in deciding who might be a good friend for you.
Once you learn to pick up on certain clues to the person’s personality by reading their face and body language, it gets a little easier to decide which people are the people you want to get to know. Not everyone is the perfect friend for everyone else. If you are picky about who you get close to then you can avoid the dreaded job of having to dump a friend. Just avoid it in the first place and pick someone you would like to be lifelong friends with! Leave the axe murderers for someone else to befriend.
Social Media Buddies
Social media is a great place to start talking to people and many find it the perfect place to start to get to know someone. After a few months of chatting on Twitter or Facebook with someone then you will really get to know what they are about without ever having committed to a friendship. It is a great place to find lots of people in your town and sort through them all to decide who might be a great potential new friend for you.
Social media is also very helpful in letting you know what events are happening in your new city. People tend to spread the word about concerts coming up, fundraisers, parades and charity events that are happening soon. You can easily stay on top of the event calendar in your city and make plans to attend a lot of new events in order to meet people.
After talking to someone on Twitter or Facebook for a while and seeing them talk up their book club or other type of mixer group, take a chance and go visit the event. You can meet the person or people you have been talking with and they will introduce you to everyone. You might not find the original person a potential best friend, but many of their friends might turn out to be great friends.
Go It Alone
It is always better to go to new places all by yourself when you want to make new friends. When you are alone people will feel at ease in striking up a conversation with you. There is nobody else with you so you don’t have any distractions. This leaves your time available for conversing with total strangers. If you are standing in a long line, mention some observation to the person in front of you or behind you in line or ask them a question. You don’t have anyone to talk to so if you are alone you will be a lot more inclined to talk to anyone you happened to be sitting next to or standing next to.
People always expect someone to be with someone else. Nobody really expects a person to be by themselves so when they discover you are alone they will be compelled to befriend you. It is human nature to take someone in who is alone. When it comes to those who are older than you, they will start trying to set you up with some single person they know. They won’t leave you alone until they make what they think is a perfect match to keep you company for the duration of the event.
If you are a guy looking to meet girls to date then start with taking a couple of classes first that can give you some tips for meeting girls in nightclubs and brush up on your manly social skills. It is best you get some great advice in how to easily talk to women without coming across as a jerk. “Hey, Baby, what’s your sign?” didn’t really work well in the 1970s and it has zero retro appeal. It is, however, a wonderful way to get rid of a girl super fast!
Doing Something You Never Have Before
Take up a new hobby. Have you always wanted to learn how to ride horses? Go take a class to learn how to do that. Learning something new with a group is a great way to meet new friends. First you have that common interest, but the learning setting is the perfect situation for talking to people. You are supposed to ask questions in order to learn the activity and so you will automatically start talking to others around you in the class in order to learn how to do certain moves or how to keep that stallion from bucking you off.
Rejecting Not Rejected
Most people are a little insecure when meeting new people. Nobody likes to be rejected. Your focus needs to be on who you are going to reject as a friend and don’t worry at all about being rejected. You will be so busy sorting through the people that you won’t have time to worry with feelings of insecurity. And besides, those insecurities are only going to turn you into a doormat. A good friend won’t wipe their feet on you and if you are so insecure about being rejected it will lead to the desperate move of being friends with any user that comes along.
So, have fun, chat with people and really check the people about to see who would make great friends. Read their body language and size them up. Save worrying about what they think of you after you have made some wonderful new friends in your new city.
Kill Two Birds with One Stone
If a new job brought you to this new city then look around for networking groups for your career. By pursuing new business contacts, it is easy to make some new friends in your line of work. Most cities have networking groups where you can make new business contacts and you are going to need some new business contacts in your new city. Plus it gets you out and about on a regular basis. You put yourself out there and talk to people easily when it comes to business so it is good practice for your personal life also.
Most people are not so self-conscious when it comes to going to a business networking event alone so that is good practice on striking up conversations with strangers. After hanging out at business parties and networking get-togethers, it is a lot easier to transition into social gatherings to meet new friends. You’ll be less awkward and find it very easy to strike up a conversation with anyone. The thought of going somewhere alone will be a lot less intimidating as well.
Meeting New People and Making Friends
How to meet people in a new city is easier than it seems if you practice talking to people and then get yourself out there. You could probably use some classes on the social aspects of people psychology first to be able to size people up easier. It is a good idea to use your social media accounts to hone in on your city so you can start some online friendships. It is very helpful to connect with people on social media to find out what is going on in your new city and discover some new friends and networking groups. Once you start learning about all the events in your new city and attending some meet-ups you’ll need to sort through the people to find those who would make good friends for you. Pick people for friends who bring out the best in you and enjoy the same activities that you enjoy. Pass on the needy types that suck all your energy with their drama and hang with those who are self-sufficient and are looking for someone to pal around with also, just like you.