Every girl knows the drill. They find a guy they’re into and after the initial excitement wears off, we ask “where is this going?”, “is he into me?”, “does he want a relationship?.” How do you find out if he’s really into you? We all know men and women are different in their approaches to dating. And unless there is open communication, a woman is often trying to figure it out herself.
We can read books or take helpful courses such as Soundscaping for Health, Relationships and Success in order to get some inkling about how to read him (of course you could always ask him straight out but that’s another time, another place). Whatever the situation we find ourselves in with a new beau, there are some telltale signs about where things are likely headed. Everyone understands the power of a relationship and the good it can do for your life so don’t waste time “hanging on.” Learn to pick up on these signs while also using traditional methods of communication and you’re on your way!
Signs that He Doesn’t Want a Relationship:
- He’s a texter. If he rarely calls you or he texts more often than he calls, that’s favors the no-relationship status. When a guy really likes a girl, he wants to hear her voice. However, younger generations are so used to communicating via text that this can really go either way.
- He’s always on his phone when you’re together and… when you’re not together he takes 2+ hours to return your text! That’s not a good sign.
- He finds reasons to blow you off or be late more times than not. Maybe he’s just flaky or disorganized, but still. Don’t make excuses. If a guy likes you and wants to continue hanging out with you, he’ll find a way to do so.
- He talks to his ex-girlfriends. Nothing makes a guy forget his ex like a girl he wants to be with. If he continues talking with an ex, that’s the first sign that he’s either not over a prior girlfriend or he’s just not that in to you.
- He avoids introducing you to his friends. He should be proud of you, want to show you off, and want to include you in his life.
- He avoids even minor instances of intimacy in public. Not all guys (and girls) are into public displays of affection but c’mon. We know when a guy is really into us, he usually needs to show it with physical intimacy in public in some small way.
- He doesn’t use the pronoun “we” or use it in the future tense. If he talks about a great new restaurant he discovered but doesn’t ask you to try it out with him, chances are he’s just not that into you.
- He doesn’t ask questions about your family and friends.
- He doesn’t initiate at least 80% of the things you do together. You find that you’re the one who makes the plans or you’re always the one who gets the conversation started about the next date.
- He hasn’t posted a picture of you together on Facebook. This one can also be a toss up but odds are, a guy who is proud of the girl he’s with and sees a future will definitely not hide that from his Facebook.
Now for the good news!
- He pays attention to you. A guy who pays attention to you is a guy who may just be ready for the next step. Men aren’t truly attentive creatures unless with someone or something they really care very deeply for.
- He wants to know you on a personal level. A guy who wants to get to know you on a personal level may be ready to have a real relationship with you. Men don’t usually waste their time getting to know people they don’t have future intentions with.
- He stops hanging around other girls. If he is ready to be your boyfriend he won’t keep hanging around other girls. Of course that doesn’t mean the bonafide friend he’s had since elementary school or his mom/sister/aunt, of course. It’s the filler type girls he’s kept around for casual dating. When you notice he stops feeling the need to keep them around, that shows strong support for the idea that he wants a relationship with you.
- He lets you in to the personal parts of his life. Guys only keep girls they consider a big part of their lives in their personal loops. If he does let you know about what his work schedule looks like, if he is taking any vacation or if he is going out of town or to an event, then he probably considers you more than just a friend.
- He’s there when you need him. When you need a shoulder to cry on, he’s there, no questions or complaints.
- He brings you around his family and friends. A man ready for a relationship with you will make sure you are involved with his family and close friends. He will do everything he can to get you guys to meet and know each other and he will also do his best to get you to like each other. A guy only brings a girlfriend-type of girl home to his family.
- You spend quality time together. You can tell a guy is ready for a relationship if he is trying to spend a lot of quality time with you. That means he is spending more than 10 minutes at a time with you. It means that he doesn’t just come around to sleep with you and that you see him in broad daylight. Yes, that is important.
- He doesn’t leave you hanging. Any guy who looks at a girl as girlfriend-material, will keep in good contact with her. He will consistently message, call or text you every day. He will reply to your texts or messages right away (unless he really is busy), but he won’t keep you waiting for long. He will make you a priority and make sure you stay in touch.
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